Winter Morning Poetry

Grey blankets on the ground
Sandwiched under by navy
Sit and watch the silence
Watch it, till it’s pierced
By a single long beep,
As the grey turns to white
And the navy to bright,
And as the soft white underneath
Is tiled by a tarmac sheet
With a beep beep bleep,
The day has begun.

Just your typical snowy winter morning poetry.

Bless snow removal workers.

Picture credits blatantly go to Pinterest because even with just a door separating me from the outdoors, I refuse to venture any more outdoors than I have to, and with my classes being done for today (and the week), I refuse to go near this “outside”.

 

 

Life To Its Fullest

This one’s admittedly a little lo-fi, but you have to understand, I’m a computer scientist, not an artist! (Walks away clutching back)

Also yes, the title’s ironic. And the irony’s a cover up for my absolute lack of decisiveness when it comes to deciding what a good title could be. Do understand I’m pathetic at titles. We’ve gotten to a point where I’ll openly admit it. Readily admit it. Our lot isn’t meant to be too creative, our only goal in life is to sleep, please.

Thanks?

Spent

The brain 

It does the best it can

But light as it is on its feet

It can’t always make it in a heartbeat 

So it calls up a friend

To take care of the backend

And clean up the mess

Before it begins

And finds a partner in crime

In the spine. 

And sometimes I wish

Good a partner as it may be,

The spine shared more of the brain’s workload

Because mine’s spent

Before I can afford it to

And I need a little more juice to push on

Come on, brain, come on

Me, I’m spent 

Somehow got to make it to the end

Might just stubbornly pull through

But man, I wish I could do that with you. 

Too Many Symbols In One Picture

Right here, in a single frame, are two iconic landmarks, both representative of the same place I’ve come to grow used to, but my word, both such contrasting figures.

Set against a foreground of what’s miraculously more ground than snow and ice, is the stone memorial Soldier’s Tower, a landmark erected in honour of soldiers who died in the two World Wars, with the CN Tower in the backdrop.

And behind the camera is an ancient relic, so old, withered and tired and falling to pieces, that the two towers might feel like budding roses next to it: me, walking home at 8.

I am so ready to get my assignment done with. I’m so ready for reading week.

I’m so ready fo—

(This post could not be completed as the author dozed off mid-post.)

Survey #39

 

*stretches out of disuse*

A rare moment of freedom and inspiration has allowed me to put out this much-procrastinated survey… it may be from September, for all I know!

 

Q: What are your plans for surviving apocalypse?

Shania: Die? Or dress Zombae’s hair. I’ll be a Zombae hairdresser: Zombae Hair Salon. Please visit!

Pranav: Probably bingewatch my 50 anime gigs and Narcos before that happens. But if I get the chance to run away like in ‘2012’, then of course, why not?

Aayush: I’ll follow Nidhi ma’am.

Anand: I shall die with music in my ears, anime in my heart and a basketball in my hands. A glorious, beautiful death.

Siddharth: Assuming that the apocalypse is the shutting down of the Internet, I’d survivse on pre-downloaded TV-shows till I run out and then live life lkike people did in the 1800s and 1900s: bare essentials.

Aayush: Just chill.

Sakshi: Stay hiddden in one of the deserted cars, because nobody pays attention to them.

Neha: If it’s a zombie apocalypse, I will camp out in a huge grocery store and stay away from bikers or people trying to find their families because 99% of the time, they’re crazier than the zombies.
If it’s a robot apocalypse, then I’d be quite happy to let them inherit the earth. They’d probably do a brilliant job.

Vyshnavi: I’m useless, so I’d die!

Eesha: I 1. am very tiny
2. care for no one
So I can hide in the weirdest of places and also will slaughter a person if needed. And I will do anything for a burger.

Shubhankar: I don’t wanna survive.

Marc: I can’t share that, or you’ll survive.    [Yeah, thank you.]

Netra: Time travel again and again until I actually die.

Nishidh: Die!

Shrinjay: You don’t survive an apocalypse.

Eeshan: Take a neverending nap.

Yusuf: I will be under the protection of “Sunita Ramesh”.   [inside joke]

Ritankar: Let’s all die together!

Kaustubh:  Get high on all kinds of drugs nd play my Xbox till I die.

Anushka: Die happily because I’ll have no reason to live.

Daivya: Just die.

Maulishri: Die!

Richa: Die.

Eva: Go with the flow, and by that I mean, you guessed it, die.

Ashay: Go to pharen country.

Jai: Go to pharen country with Ashay.

Parthiv: Go to pharen country with Jai.

Harshit: Die with a glass of wine.

Archit: Go crazy all around.

Adhvait: Watch theb world tear apart

Ronan: Behave like a caveman 🙂

Aditya: Hide in a seed vault with a truck of soil.

Shamila ma’am: Go to pharen country with Ashay, Jai and Parthiv, if they don’t mind!

Manish sir: I’d die.

Satchit: I am Cactus-Man. Nothing can hinder my survival.

Saahil: My version of the apocalypse is the one from Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs, so I’d survive it by eating all the food. I must save the world!
[Anushree: Yes, please. Especially for us vegetarians.]

Aakansha: Use my T.A.R.D.I.S. to go to another era.

Vedika: I don’t plan  to survive.

Kritika: I’d die.

Sanyukta: Just dieee!

Manasi: Apocalypse is: Sanyukta’s screching, Aditi being a rat, Aninthitha [… this response was interrupted by actual apocalypse: the reak probably ended.]

Manya: Volcanic apocalypse: novels, and enjoying it. Thank goodness it finally happened.

Manvika: Who said I wanted to survive?

Aaliya: I will cause the zombie apocalypse, run around and eat people’s brains!

Aninthitha: If there’s a robot/AI battle for domination, I’ll turn. I hate people.

Rishabh: I’d just like to chill.

Arjun: I’ll hide under a table with enough water and food.

Shivani: Don’t wanna survive!

Jahnavi: I’d travel to another universe.

Vidhi: Stock up on pizza and coke in a cool place below the surface of the earth.

Anisha: Take all my books and hide in a cave/island/bunker.

Arshya: Hide somewhere.

Anandita: Huh? Plan? Whaat?

Aelin (pseudonym): Apocalypse: there’s no music and books in the  world anymore.
How I’ll survive:  Learn how to sing and manufactjure instruments, especially guitars and pianos.

Pragya: Apocalypse: No colours, everything is plain, black and white.
How I’ll survive: I’ll learn to paint and manufacture brushes, paints, everything related to art.

Manasi (again):  lmao I’d die first (unfit af).

Aryaa: Survival of the fittest! I will fight to death.  [this response hs been awarded seven stars and an “A++++++” by a fellow  surveyee]

Anushree: I’ll accompany Akicchi because she’ll know how to operate T.A.R.D.I.S. (I’m not a Whovian).

Aditi: I am ready for apocalypse. I have a secret candy stash (not telling where it is), I can survive in a bunker without meeting humans for days, and I’m not a very virtuous person either.
What more do you need?

Gauri: Build a bunker, fill it with an assortment of food, but mostly chocolate and cheese, stay there and watch movies for the remainder of my life.

Tanishi: I don’t wnna live! I’d die– happily!

Yatin: Promise me a pizza nd a smoothie, and maybe I’ll change sides.

Raghav: All the meth!

Ayushi:  I wouldn’t want to survive it. I’d prefer to die.

Jatin: Food suply, ammo and a shotgun.

Radhika: Lay down on the road and act like I’m dead.

Mahwash:  I would hoard pizzas and hang out with Arnab Goswami (to break the ice).

Anshul: Die before it even hits. Simple.

Deepan: Already going through one. It’s called twelfth grade.

Satvik: Lock myself up and meditate, then probaby get the zombies to self-actualization  and become their spiritual leader (not to be confused with MSG).

Punyam: No die.

 

Know what, the final verdict is out. We’re not going to make it. But I hope I make it, to the next survey! I’ve still tons of that crazy stuff to put out. Hold on tight.

Bake Yourself a Happy Holiday Season!

I’m writing this one because I couldn’t not.

It’s that time of the year: vacation!

It’s the time kick back, have no fear, to give a cheer, and throw those books high in the air…
No, that wouldn’t be necessary. They already pile up that high.
Besides, I’m not one to throw books.

And that was the most pointless introduction I’ve ever written.

Anyway, let’s cut right to it.
Holidays are here, and while no one’s holidaying, it has been a pleasure to wake up at 11 am.
I won’t say anything about sleeping at 2… that’s sort of become the norm, hasn’t it?

I have, to my utmost satisfaction, replaced a computer textbook with a Ludlum book- of the Jason Bourne series- for  a while… that’s ephemeral.

But anyway… holiday season.
Allow me to address some myths.
Some folks worry that all the holiday spirit and sweet will, well, do what sweets are apparently supposed to do.
Tell that to someone who’s cupboard cleaning has finally caught up with them.
Or to someone who’s turned the house upside down whilst looking for a lost novel.
Or to someone frozen in a kneel-down position, carefully filling the floor with chalk powder.
Or someone stretching out to six feet in height to reach that nail on top to hang some lights.
Or to someone who’s spent their vacation the way a twelfth grader does. Sigh.

Holiday season… that time of the year when wearing itchy embroidered netted weirdly shaped clothes is no longer an accepted form of torture, but a must.

I’m staring at a possibility of being put into one and told how ‘cute’ it looks this year.
How can a seventeen year-old look cute.
But I’m not here to rant. I’m making an observation.
I imagine male traditional must be a lot more comfortable than female trad.
The worst that can happen in Indian male trad? Embroidery. Heavy embroidery. Terrible fitting.
But female trad?
The way most of the upper clothes are made is quite different from your average tee.
They’re made to narrow down around the rib cage and the waist. The male ones aren’t, they ‘flow’.

You wear a fem trad by pulling it over your head. Think of the discomfort of pulling something that narrow over your chest.
Female chest, might I remind you.

Then there’s the next level, who’s levels of discomfort I cannot even begin to imagine: the sari.
All I can do is wear the most constricting military can get, and salute.

Yet, it might finally catch up to me- the dreaded trad!
(This comes from a T-shirt wearer!)
So wish me luck!

So, holiday season… I lost my rangoli making virginity.
First time, and I went straight in with the powders!
Incidentally, my mum gave up and bought stencils this year.
I gifted her a protractor that made its way back during a cleanup session, which she promptly returned.
“I’ll leave the technical aspects to you”, was her succinct reply.

And so I did.

b356bcf0c4b3924ca297355118454314
Here’s the world-famous twelfth grader entering familiar territory…

What else can you expect from me.

I went ahead, went overboard and made a Bakelite rangoli.
You can’t argue with me, because it’s symmetrical.

img_1402.jpg

I got an immediate reaction from mum: a facepalm. But she does admit I did a much better job than her!
Heck, even the structure’s accurate, check with the IUPAC!

So did I study today, or did I not?
(Except that isn’t a valid question… despite all my rants, I don’t study everyday, not until we’re two weeks away from apocalypse!)

So sleep a little more, and happy Diwali from me!

Reel Saturated

Aargh, why do I feel these days like movie scripts are a waste of actors, and half the time actors are a waste of scripts?
Have the scriptwriters lost their own attention spans? Are they writing a few punchlines and getting a sixth grader to fill in the rest of the pages?
Half the punchlines, I see the pleading faces of an embarrassed actor on screen: please do laugh when you hear this!
Some seem bored, some are boring, and why is it that the one day I ditch my nonexistent schedule for a movie it must be such a bore?
Yes, I did go for a movie, and I carried a backup with me that did end up saving me a few hours of cringing: my phone, with noise blocking earphones I scored off my mother. (Mine don’t block out noise.)
Well if you asked me if it was worth my time, I’d say it was, because I caught the decent parts of a movie and watched 2 episodes of Arrow!
Now that’s a few hours well spent, I feel proud.

On a related note, if you’ve spent too long around physics textbooks, I think sometimes, it can screw up your movie-watching experience. (Quite literally)
I sat in the hall with muffled sounds in my ears, I could hear when I wanted to, and I heard a bit of dialogue at a point. Seemed interesting, I paused my episode.
There was someone named Helix getting beaten up by the hero.
I’m thinking, oh, how interesting, there’s a guy named Helix. Never seen that before. I’m not even sitting for a sci-fi movie where a bad guy ‘screws’ everyone over, what’s the deal?
Right on cue, Helix tumbles down a staircase rolling, might I mention, in helical motion.
Ah, that must be why a self-proclaimed comedy film has a baddie who spirals down staircases, named Helix.

Fast forward two hours, I realised his name was really Alex all the while.
Boy, am I saturated with physics.

Journaling my Journal

Trying to work on finishing my lab manual.

How blockbuster.
I have until sundown to finish writing all my physics practical experiments. Great job, Teach’.
That was delivered to cinematic perfection.

I had all holidays to do it, but I didn’t. I told myself, once my tests are done, I will write the damned thing, it’s all in a day’s work.
And then I let it go.

Till today. Teach’ drops it in so casually, you couldn’t have imagined it causing any damage till the damage was done.
Plenty whaaaaaaat?????’s follow.

I’m writing a physics journal write now. Oh, sorry, I meant right now.
But I’m also journaling my writing of my journal. ‘Cuz I’m bored.

Disclaimer: I don’t suppose this is going to be all grammatically correct, since it’s just a draft of thought. My main aim is to finish the journal, this is ‘cuz I’m bored. And why not, it may even be a guideline to someone else who’s on the last minute thing. (Don’t leave it to then!)

Well, here I am then, physics journal. But I’m doing maths. I’ve planned it out.
20 minutes an experiment. 15 experiments. 5 hours? I should be done by 12! Joy, I may get a few hours of sleep!

Fact: My last journal writing period was exactly like this one.
One day to go, a whole journal to complete.
It took till 1 then, but the good part was that I finished listening to (and pretty much learned by heart) the whole Sounds of Silence album.

I have too much journal work left to include a link. But Google exists and thrives for a reason. Give a listen sometime.

Update on my journal: I’m thinking of throwing in some Lorem Ipsum in the procedure and listening to Nirvana.

Journal writing can be a very creative process.
You need to think of the shortest word to replace a sentence and still need it to look convincingly long. I don’t even have a very big handwriting.

Did you know you can covert a galvanometer into a voltmeter? All you need is a little patience, very high resistance converted in series luck.

14 experiments to go!

Mean heart
Cold heart
Cold heart
Cold heart

These are not only Tourette’s lyrics.

Hello darkness my old Friend
I’ve come to talk with you again
Because I plan to see you and then shut my eyes again
And resume my sleeping

What an idea would bunking be tomorrow?
I’ve 14 experiments and, like 7 hours before the day changes.

Did anyone watch England’s incredible 377-7 against Pakistan in the Women’s World Cup yesterday?? Shame it was rained out, as today’s game (SA vs NZ) looks to be heading to, but Pak had their task cut out. Ayesha Zafar batting pretty well, though.

I feel like Usain Bolt.

“You take a 98% concentration fuming nitric acid and add the acid to three times the amount of sulphuric acid. Do this in an ice bath. Then add glycerin with an eyedropper, drop by drop. You have nitroglycerin.”
Nitroglycerin is a dynamite.

Fight Club is the one time you’ll love chemistry. Unless you love it already.
The part I love, is that I actually understand what he’s saying out there.
Now back to the physics.

I just cut down a three line point to half a line. Then I realised that doesn’t work. Then I had l lengthen it. Manipulate your manipulation. We lead sad lives.

A friend once said they felt wrong being ungrammatical in notes. I think we’ve passed that stage a while ago. I’ve lost all my articles. And most words under three letters. Unless they’re absolutely necessary.

Rain, rain, please leave England
I believe you’re better appreciated here than in no man’s land
Please flood the school entrance till no one can enter
If you’d like to keep going, the more the better
We’ll decide how much to grade my journal based on synchronised swimming with excuses.
(I’ve picked up quite a few on the last survey.)

Hamlet’s eternal dilemma: to take a bathroom break, or not to take a bathroom break.
I’d thought a phone break was out of question, to be honest.

I’m thinking of the song Friday I’m In Love. Would it have hurt to have been a Friday?

Enough with me being a Negative Creep. I’ll be more positive now. Not for the wrong reasons. But I may just finish.

Last year’s physics journal anecdotes:
A friend finished his journal with quite a flourish last year: his procedures included half the class’ names and movie dialogues.

Another pal began writing her journal with music on. Her aim turned out to be a lyric. The page found it’s way to the dustbin. She later tells me, I mostly listen to instrumental stuff while studying.

We’re losing handwriting. And time.

How many pens will I finish in one sitting?

Only twelve to go!!

Spherical Mirror Parallax removal: The one time looking in a mirror is not vanity.

Past journal anecdotes: (not mine this time)
Our physics teacher had once told us that an examiner had been unhappy with a graph in a mirror experiment that labelled ‘u’ (object distance) and ‘v’ (image distance) because she felt it could get mistaken for ‘u’ – initial velocity and ‘v’ – final velocity. Speeds in a mirror! We’ve seen it all.

I actually don’t know who I’m trying to entertain throughout my journal writing.
My chances of finally making it in time? Not.

It started raining suddenly and hard this evening. A cat got surprised and yowled in agony. And again. And again. For ten whole minutes!

I was happy in the haze of a drunken hour
And heaven knows I’m miserable now

– Sounds like me all of last week. And the holidays.
(The song is by the Smiths.)

Yesterday
All my troubles seemed so far away
Now it looks as though they’re here to stay
Oh I believe in yesterday
(and tomorrow, forevermore, procrastination)

Suddenly
I’m not half the man I used to be
There’s a shadow hanging over me
(under my eyes)
Oh yesterday today came suddenly

I He said something wrong now I long for yesterday
(and all my nonexistent summer break)

Soon to come: An Ode to Coffee.
We’re not yet at that stage, it’s like, 8 o’ clock. Still running.
Have I mentioned I feel like Usain Bolt?

My little sister these days knows more practical science than me.
We’ve reached a point where Facebook videos have better science ideas than a 12th grade physics/chemistry textbook.
Who knew the worth of a hot glue gun.
(Soldering guns can be used to fix pickups. Guitarist, alert!)

11 to go!

This countdown seems worth it. Almost. If only it could move as quick as the doomsday clock.

If only this work were cheese
Everyone would be at ease

Cheese and fine wine are a few things that only get better with procrastination, unlike my situation.

Wait, introspection when I’m only 5 down? What am I doing!

I’m looking hopefully to the sky for a number of reasons:

a) When the zetas fill the skies
It’s just our leaders in disguise
b) Rain. Rain? Rain! RAIN!?
c) Looking for the odd-lightning bolt to strike and turn me into the Flash. I need the speed.

At 9:30, as I sit and write a lens experiment, my instincts open up. My situation is clear before me.
Everything comes into ‘focus’. 😉
(Naw, have I fallen this low?)

My book cautions that in an optical bench experiment, “tips of the needles should be as high as the lens.”
I don’t know what to interpret anymore.

I just misread sexiest as sexist. Am I getting defensive, or is the work getting me?
(Don’t worry, it wasn’t in the physics book.)

10 to go.

Declare this an emergency
Come on and spread a sense of urgency
And pull us through
And pull us through
And this is the end
This is the end
Of the world

(There will always be a Muse influence on me. Sue me.)

Teacher, leave us kids alone!
All in all, it’s just another brick in the wall
All in all, it’s just another prick in the wall.

Sigh. 9 to go.

9 still to go, but I’ll keep updating here!

Someone get me a fast forward button for the night.

I’ve realised my maths assumption at the start of this Herculean task was probably as screwed up as I’m going to be by tomorrow morning.

Journal/Practicals anecdote: We were doing an experiment with a travelling microscope.

A pal of mine, great guy asks our teacher, “Ma’am, if I take a microscope with me for a weekend drive, does it become a travelling microscope?”

Practicals fact: My chemistry lab partner and I have set off the smoke alarms in the chemistry lab twice in two weeks already.

Test tubes can get awful c-c-cold
(Talkin’ ’bout my generation)
Why not break some before you get old
(Talkin’ ’bout my generation)

Been there, done that.

I got no motivation
Where is my motivation
No time for the motivation
Smoking my inspiration

(Lyrics to Longview by Green Day.
I can see those alarms going off a third time.)

Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
You trust, you must
Confess
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

Yes, I must confess, I didn’t imagine it was this much. I told a friend in the evening, that with 12 experiments to go, I’ll probably complete by midnight!

She laughed nervously and said, honey, I don’t mean to burst your bubble, but that ain’t happening. Not today.

Shit, I suppose.

Oh no love! You’re not alone
No matter what or who you’ve been
No matter when or where you’ve seen
All the knives seem to lacerate your brain
I’ve had my share, I’ll help you with the pain
You’re not alone!

Oh, dear, I actually want someone to tell me this right now!

We’re now in the next day. Crap. Aborting mission? Almost at that! Maybe a few more…

She says we’ve gotta hold on to what we’ve got.
It doesn’t make a difference if we make it or not.
We’ve got each other and that’s a lot.
For love we’ll give it a shot.
Whoaaaa, we’re half way there
Whoaaaaao, Livin’ on a Prayer
Take my hand and we’ll make it I swear
Whoaaaa, Livin’ on a Prayer

It actually doesn’t make a difference anymore… It’s sleep or coffee, every cell for itself!

So… I end the day with 7 experiments to go… Not too bad progress! I’ll have to fend for myself tomorrow, but I gotta admit, it’s been an interesting journal writing session.

Thanks for keeping me company all these hours! (Sort of.)

Sparks will fly and smoke alarms will ring tomorrow.

Good night!


Update!

This is after school, the next day.

For anyone who’d want to know about the smoke alarms, or how the day after went, I’ll let you in on this.

You know, life has funny ways of going about itself.

I decided not to bunk, despite the fact that I slept at 12:30 and got up at 7.

50% of my class bunked. Was that encouraging? We actually had 50% of the class present, that was a surprisingly big number of people attending! 😛

So our present population also had a big number of people who hadn’t completed their journals, and we figured,

If we die, we’ll die together,

And then the first period for the day begins.

It’s English. Our teacher’s busy next week. She wants some extra teaching time.

Guess what? She’s decided to borrow time off physics. Not ten minutes or so. The whole period.

I’ve lucked out! All that was running through my head was this: ‘Well, what do you know! I guess sometimes Fortune does favour the brave!’

So in the end, I have a great experience behind me, and all’s well that ends well!

Just 7 experiments to go!


So how did today go?

I’ve decided that both I and other readers would be pretty fed up with scrolling down endlessly through till we both have finger sores (wait a minute. I’ve written a journal for, what, a net worth of ten hours, are we talking about my finger sores?), so Day 2 of my conquest is a separate post.

Follow the madness here!

(And thanks for keeping me company through those lonesome early hours of the day!)

Survey #27

Kia ora, back with another survey, and if you never employ any of these guys as teachers in kindergarten, you will thank me 20 years later! 😛

(Kidding, they’re awesome folks.)

Q: If you could teach a five year-old something, what would it be?

Aakansha: How to handle taxes. (Because no one teaches that.)

Rashiv: How to shoot an arrow.

Mohak: Introduce him to many games, unless he is an ESports champ already, you never know…

Eva: Manners and how to play the guitar.

Maulishree: To shut up!

Simant: Never to waste his two precious years with PACE. [Shania’s comment: //[YES, THAT’S HOW YOU PUT A COMMENT!] What a sexist.]

Ronan: How to never give up on someone.

Aditya: Zen Koans.

Anushka: Never trust anyone.

Khushi: Physics and math and lots of poetry and how to learn.

Yusuf: How not to take engineering in the future and be happy with what they have.

Shania: How to make candies and chocolates and get cavities. And how to make their teeth crooked. And encourage them to get braces in 4th grade. All of them. So that no one gets bullied for having braces. 😥  #RevengeButNotReally.

Richa: To follow Maulishree’s instructions.

Saahil: Don’t fall in love. It hurts like… Well, a female dog.

Shubhankar: Calculus.

Archit: Don’t go to school.

Anand: Not worth teaching anything.

Siddharth: I’d teach him/her to flip their parents off XD

Aayush: How to learn.

Vyshnavi: To love Coldplay.

Daivya: Creativity.

Shamila ma’am: Be satisfied with what you have so that it remains with you in the future.

Manya: Enjoy life (irritate others) mwahahaha.

Anushree: I’d teach the kid how to break all the rules set by his/her mum.

Keerti: The basic lesson of life: don’t fall in love.

Kritika: Math.

Rishabh: Math.

Deepan: To never bend to society’s expectations and conform to it’s limitations, but to understand oneself better than you understand anything else.

Diya: I would teach him/her not to text anyone randomly on Facebook. (Because when they grow up, they’ll regret it.)

Sudhanshu: Life’s a race and don’t be blind enough to follow the race.

[Race, life’s a race
And I’m gonna win
Yes I’m gonna win
I’ll light the…   I should stop doing this.]

Shefali: Never take PCM in life.

Nirmiti: The art of loving oneself no matter what.

Aaliya: Sex education.

Saif: Combat skills.

Amrita: Not to be scared of others’ judgements.

Afifa: To be a Weeknd fan.

Sakshi: How to bake a chocolate cake.

Mahima: Never cheat on yourself. Life’s a gamble, play your cards wisely.

Arjun: Dudism and some very important values. Research based thinking.

Shivani: How to be a ninja.

Vani: How to be silent.

Lamha: How to kill people and how to make chocolate and give it to me.

Manasi: Sex ed, kinky porn; I’ll teach them the correct toys to use.

Ani: How to kill yourself and every kid around.

Sanyukta: How to die.

Ani #2: Teach them that chokers like your mothers’ dupattas are back in fashion. [Manasi: Did you mean the noose?]

Ani #3: Wear really old black eyeliner excessively and die of lead poisoning.

Manvika: I wouldn’t spend my time teaching five year-olds anything, it’s pointless- they won’t learn anything.

Anamika ma’am: I’d teach them to pack a punch, and swear words.

Akanksha: To love animals.

Charul: How to get away with murder.

Ajinkya: To beatbox.

Harshuday: Football. So they don’t play like Lakshit.

Lakshit: Video gaming.

Hardik: Basketball.

Raghav: Maths.

Krishnan: Music.

Samadrita: Good manners.

Anandita: Yeah ^ that, and how to talk softly.

Aditi: How to do nakhra.

Jahnavi: Math. (Because I suck at it.)

Girisha: Duniya zaalim hai.

Unnati: Be you.

Shalini: Mah lyf mah rulz.

Pragya: How to explore and admire nature.

Hrutvi: Teach them sex.

Niti: Teach them pronunciations of difficult words.

Vidhi: Pizza should be the only constant in life. Always.

Survey #26

Kia ora! Back after forever, excuse me for being a seriously lazy summertime surveyor, but hey, I’m on vacation too!

Well, (To quote a certain someone,) I’m back, ‘tanned, rested and ready’. Now to the real nazz. (cracks knuckles)

Here’s the second last one before the summer. It analyses how prepared we may be for World War Three.

(We’d also had a bit of a glitch here, a technical bug had wiped some of our data, so servers had been temporarily down. But we’re back up and running, with better reflexes and updated antivirus.)

Q: What would be your weapon of choice in battle?

Pranav: Kagune.

Faker On Purpose: Pranav’s adorably ugly wink.  😉

Rajveer: Doraemon.

Jatin: Goku’s powers. #Siyajin #Kamelameha #<3 anime.

Ayushi: Oil.

Shlok: Pokémon.

Anushka: Tomatoes, eggs.

Sakshi: Catapults, fireballs.

Rishabh: Atom bomb!

Daivya: Intelligence.

Nirmiti: #FartBombsAllTheWay.

Diya: Bazooka.

Shivani: Ninja stars.

Satchit: Mur’tagh.

Lamha: A pencil in a one-on-one battle.
In a “group” battle, chocolate and ice cream, then pianos.
[The reasoning: First shower candies. While the opponents have their guard down and think, “Oh, that’s not bad,” she launches the pianos. Have a flat day.]

Shreya: Something highly ruthless.

Aayushi: Aditya.

Anandita: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaah, I don’t know. [Wowzers.]

Rashiv: Arrows. (Ain’t that obvious? :P)

Akanksha: A large bag of chocolate.

Ajinkya: MMG.

Harshuday: RPG.

Shania: Bananas.

Riya: A sword.

Manya: My laugh or scream.
[Surveyor certified.
A comment from Arjun: “Your high-fives too.”]

Suchismita: RD Sharma textbook.

Anisha: Suchi.

Vaishnavi: Bazooka.

Divya: A bow and arrow

Ani: [font size x5, caps, <insert all tools of emphasis>] SWORD cutlass
Do not go gentle into the good night
Rage, rage against THE GLINT OF MY KICKASS SWORD YOU MF BITCH

Arjun: Arushi when her name is misspelled as Arushi.

Sakshi: Courage.

Manasi: My jokes.
My jokes are identified as kilometres per second because every time people listen to them, they say “I want to k.m.s.” #SecretNuke.

Amrita: Ignorance.  😦

Charul: My superpowers.

Aditi: Perry the Platypus.

Satchit #2: MOAB.

Aditya: The seven ribbons of Hathor.

Ashay: An overly frozen burrito.

Aakansha: Crescent rose and Myretenaster.

Satchit #3: Justin Beiber and a sound system.

Deepan: If good music is my enemy, then EDM. (This isn’t open to inference.)

Raghav: Katana.

Khushi: Cheesecake.

Aaliya: A machine gun and a knife.

Eva: My fist.

Aparajithaa: A gun.

Kshitij: Using a missile in horizontal projectile motion.

Saarthak: My Mind and the Power of Probability.

Aryan: My superpower. [which is?]

Sidharth: A badass gun that shoots acid bullets which are incendiary as well.

Punyam: Blood.

Manvika: Frying pan! [pleease, who all got that?!]

Sai: One side a sword and one side a laser gun.

Harsha: Invisibility, a power to control minds. (Xavier)

Aayush: My tongue.

Tanishi: My daughter.

Ajinkya: Bahama cannon.

Anushree: Brains. Brains over brawn, bruh.

Vani: Balloons filled with poisonous gas. Everyone wants to burst them and then boom!

Anamika ma’am: Guns!

Karina: Daggers.

Samadrita: Kill ’em with kindness.
If Aayushi takes another weapon, I’ll take Aditya. XD